Dave’s Football Blog

Reuben Droughns
used to run the football fields of Mile Hiiiiigh.
Then the word was sent down.
He was traded to the Browns.
He started then, and he’ll start now.
Reuben Drooooooooughns!
Yee-hah!

Say what you will about Todd Sauerbrun — I sure do — but even with all of his issues with steroids and meat loaf, he probably doesn’t team up with goons to attack autograph seekers.

Then again, how many kickers get autograph hounds chasing after them?

I recorded the 60 Minutes report tonight on Dr. James Shortt and the steroid prescriptions he wrote for several Carolina Panthers, including punter Todd Sauerbrun and a couple of linemen. I’ll have more to say about it after reviewing it a few times. For now, all I’ll say is this…

What the fuck could possess a punter to want to bulk up? Especially one that is already overweight from all that gravy? Wouldn’t the objective be not to bulk up?

In a desperate attempt to keep this blog semi-relevant at the end of March, when the rest of the general public is eagerly awaiting Daylight Savings Time and cursing their NCAA Tournament brackets (Vermont!? Bucknell!? Jesus H. Christ…), I’ve added a couple of off-season links to the right-hand menu:

1.) The Player Tracker serves up a full rundown of what free agents signed with which teams during the offseason. Naturally, it starts on the AFC North…

2.) The Offseason Calendar covers important dates leading up to the next glorious football season.

There’s not a lot of news out there right now, so reports here will be spotty until the new season draws near. In the meantime, it’s a really nice day outside. Go grab a football and work on your forward pass or something…

You were enough of a prick when you beat the Panthers on Jan. 2. Unless you have some actual proof that someone besides Steve Courson used steroids while playing for the Steelers in the 1970s, shut your piehole.

As reported by AP:

David Little, a durable linebacker for the Pittsburgh Steelers who was voted to the Pro Bowl in 1990, died while weightlifting at home in Miami. He was 46.

Little had heart disease, and a cardiac fluttering Thursday caused him to drop on his chest 250 pounds of weights, which rolled onto his neck and suffocated him, the coroner said Tuesday. Little was found by his sons, David Jr. and Darien.

Y’know, sad as this is, I think AP probably could have just said “weightlifting accident” and left it at that…

Last week, the Pittsburgh Steelers restructured the contract of left tackle Marvel Smith so that they could free up about $2.5 million in salary cap space. Reports out of Pittsburgh indicate that this money will be used either to sign draft picks or restricted free agents.

If that’s all the room they have, it’s no wonder they passed on Plaxico Burress, who signed a six-year, $25 million deal with the Giants last week. If it came down to Plax vs. their entire draft class, I can imagine which might seem more important to the Steelers, who traditionally draft pretty well.

Of course, there’s no telling whether or not Cedrick Wilson would fit into the offense as well as Plax. He’s obviously not a bad receiver, and he will make Antwaan Randle El work a little harder to remain in a starting role, but as far as I can see, he’s as big a question mark as the Steelers’ secondary coming into next season…

Is it just me, or does the Human Torch bear a strange resemblance to Ben Roethlisberger?

Apparently, “We are no longer offering you a contract” is Giants-speak for “Your agent is a yogurthead.” So Plax got himself a new agent, and this, he signed a long-term deal with New York after all.

Isn’t it funny how Burress decided to catch passes from Eli Manning instead of Ben Roethlisberger, when it was pretty obvious which one was the better QB last year?

…or did Cris Carter just call Plaxico Burress a big fat loser?