Dave’s Football Blog

The 2008 Tri-Nations Rugby Union series kicked off today in New Zealand — you may have seen the giant ad for it to the right there — and what better way to get it started than with a big fat haka from the All Blacks? If that doesn’t get your blood pumping a little faster, nothing will. (In case you’re wondering, yes, the Stellenbosch ELVs are being tested this year.)

The boys at MediaZone were nice enough to hook me up with a Rugby Channel account, which I will be testing today. They seem eager to give away a free one-month subscription to the Rugby Channel through this site, so keep an eye on this blog for details.

Ecuadorian club LDU Quito defeated Brazilian giants Fluminese to win the Copa Libertadores. LDU Quito also wins the honor of getting destroyed by Manchester United at the FIFA Club World Cup in Japan next December.

So let me get this straight.

Canada is more than happy to participate in just about every major American sports league there is. Baseball? Sure, come on up to Toronto. Basketball? No problem. We’re happy to launch the Raptors and Grizzlies north of the border. Soccer? Hey, we’d love to have Toronto FC in MLS. Look at our crazy fans! Let’s do this in Montreal, too! We love this stuff!

But when the NFL starts making a move into Canada, suddenly, those American interlopers are trying to destroy our Canadian culture! Newspapers are up in arms! Politicians cry out that we must look out for the good for the country! PR people are producing videos like this:

Yeah! This is our league! Keep your league out of our borders, you 100-yard heathens!

You know what? I don’t see you Canadians rushing to pull all your hockey teams out of the NHL and forming your own uniquely Canadian hockey league. I don’t see you trying to build on the success of Toronto FC, the Montreal Impact and the Vancouver Whitecaps and building your own uniquely Canadian soccer league. All you have is a tri-cities championship and an association that can’t pull its head out of its arse. You’re not rushing to kick the Raptors out of Toronto, either, are you?

But no, 3-down, 110-yard football is such a vital part of your heritage, isn’t it? What would we ever do without the Grey Cup?

You’d watch the NFL, that’s what. It’s the same reason so many soccer fans who enjoy the Premier League and EURO 2008 can’t seem to get into MLS games. People want to see the best players play at the highest level, and for the gridiron game, those players aren’t in Canada. They’re in the NFL. That’s why CFL expansion into America failed in the 1990s. We don’t want minor league football in this country, and that’s what most people think the CFL is. The best CFL players almost always move south to the NFL. Most of those players played college football in the USA, anyway. It’s not like they’re switching from rugby union to rugby league or something.

Hey, here’s an idea — why don’t you dump all those Burnside Rules and go back to playing rugby union? That was your gift to America back in 1874, wasn’t it? Then Thrift Burnside came along and took some ideas from Walter Camp, and 100 years later, it constitutes Canadian culture. How fitting.

Here’s another idea — if you’re so worried about the survival of the CFL, Canada, why don’t you go round up some mounties and have them surround the Rogers Centre so that the Buffalo Bills won’t be able to get inside to play there? It won’t happen, Canada, and you know why? Canadian fans want to see the best football players in the world, too. Plus, you’re too chickenshit to build your own national leagues in other major sports. If an NFL team in Toronto destroys the CFL, then maybe the CFL isn’t good enough to stand on its own, eh?

This is just further proof that the Wizards are, in fact, worthy of my scorn. Ha.

This is a video I put together for Soccer FanHouse about Chelsea's new partnership with Capital Area Soccer League, a youth soccer club in Raleigh.

Despite my continued attempts to play up this tournament on FanHouse, U.S. Open Cup fever hasn’t exactly swept the nation. You can tell this by comparing and contrasting the atmosphere at D.C. United’s weekend trashing of the the L.A. Galaxy with the scene at their 2-0 win last night over the Rochester Rhinos of USL-1. Abram Fox at DC Sports Box did that for us:

How strange was it to watch United and the Rhinos face off in a rural, albeit massive soccer complex in Boyds, MD rather than the spacious confines of RFK Stadium in the District? To be able to hear the thud of ball on foot and the shouts between players, rather than merely watch the game from afar and take such sounds for granted?

Two days prior D.C. played the Los Angeles Galaxy and David Beckham in front of 35,979 screaming fans and a nationwide audience on ABC in the sweltering midday heat. On Tuesday that dynamic setting was all but forgotten, as 2,752 mostly-quiet fans settled onto the bleachers and enjoyed the clear, humidity-less summer twilight.

Barra Brava still showed, as did the Screaming Eagles and La Norte, but their numbers measured less in the thousands with drums than in the dozens and a drum.

I understand why, of course. D.C. United has bigger fish to fry than the U.S. Open Cup. The million-dollar SuperLiga is a week and a half away, the CONCACAF Champions League is just around the corner, and this team really wants to win MLS Cup this year. Plus, rent for RFK Stadium can’t be cheap, and the Rochester Rhinos aren’t going to pull nearly as many Screaming Eagles as Posh’s husband. (That’s why the New York Red Bulls never schedule home games for the Open Cup. Renting out Giants Stadium for a crowd of 5,000 just doesn’t make financial sense. Better to throw out the reserves in Baltimore against Crystal Palace USA and get out quick.)

On the other hand, the Chicago Fire are traveling to D.C. next Tuesday in what will be the marquee match of the Open Cup quarterfinals. This game will also be played at Maryland SoccerPlex instead of RFK. I suspect that was a precautionary measure, just in case they drew Crystal Palace. Still, the Fire brought 18,000+ to RFK Stadium in May, and last month’s match in Toyota Park was a testy affair in which 9-man United undid 10-man Chicago in stoppage time. Doesn’t it seem like D.C. United v. Chicago Fire deserves a slightly bigger stage than this?

Well, I guess Curt Onalfo doesn’t really give a shit about the U.S. Open Cup until he realizes his side is down 2-0 in the second half to a mid-table USL-1 club.

That’s when he throws Claudio Lopez into the game and tells him to start pushing forward. One goal and one bad penalty — which led to Railhawks fans singing, “Who’s your father, who’s your father, who’s your father, referee?” — and suddenly, we’re in extra time. A breakaway goal by the Wizards and another late penalty sealed the deal.

Then the Wizards decided to start a fight in the final minute of stoppage time for no good reason, and they got a Railhawk player sent off for it. None of their players were shown the red card, despite some punches being thrown. Then one of their players capped it off by sending the final free kick of the game into the stands. It appeared he wanted to peg a fan in the head as people were leaving. Classy.

I may not care that much about MLS, but at least I have a team to hate now. Eat shit and die, Wizards. I hope you chimpfuckers rot in the MLS East cellar until the day MLS forces you to move to St. Louis.

*sigh* I’ve had better nights than this…

Anyway, it appears only three USL clubs at the most will make it out of the 3rd round this year. Crystal Palace Baltimore upset the New York Red Bulls, 2-0, much to the consternation of Ives Galarcep, and the Charleston Battery advanced on PKs over the Houston Dynamo. As I type this, the Seattle Sounders are up 1-0 on Chivas USA early in the second half. I’m watching it right now on USLLive.com. I might update this later.

UPDATE: Seattle won, 2-0, which means I’ll be cheering against the Sounders on Thursday and for the Sounders next Tuesday. By the way, I estimate the Railhawks saved about $15,000 by losing tonight, so there’s that.

From the Postmen: "If my roommate can go from hating soccer to loving it just thanks to a videogame and a European competition, there?s hope for everyone else."

Or "How I learned to stop twiddling my thumbs during the NFL offseason and love other football codes."

Notice how he's playing in Victoria and not Western Australia. I couldn't possibly imagine why...